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Every day I notice my mistakes,
Every day I make the same ones,
Every day I live in a fantasy
Every day I still pretend.

Pretending is one thing, But
doing it every day becomes a skill.
I am an actress,
You wouldn't tell.

Be Happy
Act like the group
Show no emotions.
I continually tell myself.

It works. Nobody notices.

Finding a way to blend in is easy,
Keeping pretending is the challenge.
I am as real as the next girl,
Even if I pretend

Five years we've been together, This group and I
I thought they all would see past the plastic smiles.
Twelve years I have known two of them there.
Even they do not notice or if they do.
Do not care.

Pretending not to care is a skill.

Shocking.Hurtful.Disgrace. Invisible
Those words run through my mind.
I'm in a glass box where I can see out but nobody see's in.
Despite me leaving the key to the door.
Until that one person notices and comes to my aid.
Or so I thought.
They enter but do not see.

"I don't understand why she doesn't just tell us when things are wrong" I hear
"She is such a moany bitch, all she ever does is complain" I hear
"She never makes an effort in anything" I hear
"You're not the only person with problems you know" I hear

I tell what's wrong. I could scream it at the top of my lungs, nobody can hear.
When they do hear I am labelled.
Seriously, How can I do both?
I cannot keep the lid on as well as blowing it off.
An effort is something I always make.
Nobody notices.

So I pretend.

Everybody has problems.
So do I.
How I deal with them is my concern.
Not yours.

However, as always.

Is that one thing that is easy to do.
After a while.

I show my true colours,
They don't like it.
They like the actress that they see.
Not the unhappy girl behind the glass.

After a while that
Gets tiring.

"Haha you can't act"
"You're such a bad liar"
I am told.

I do them every day.
I am a plastic doll without the makeup
It is perfectly fine to be plastic.
It's perfectly fine to be in that world of make believe

Why should that be allowed?
There the same.
There something that should be fun.
Not a part of everyday life.

Alas. In the end.

Is this my fault this happens?
Is it because I have the wrong friends?


Could this the moulding of modern society?


Welcome to the world of fiction.
Where the true you will be locked away.
In its place.
You will get plastic.
Welcome to the world of pretending.
Where these acting games aren't for fun.
There for real...
Add a Comment:
StolenIndigo Featured By Owner Jul 4, 2011
i can relate to this :heart:
Kairi-21 Featured By Owner Mar 26, 2011  Hobbyist Writer
I feel this everyday. I get it. I'm so glad someone could put it into words in such an artistic way. I love it. :D
yami-joey Featured By Owner Mar 25, 2011  Student General Artist
It's true.

But it can hurt terribly. It can hurt badly.

You can't always pretend forever...

Will there be a friend who can ever accept your true colors? I'm sure there is one... unless everyone in your society are just too SELFISH ...

hope you get through... keep up the faith and never ever lose hope!!
EvokeInnocence Featured By Owner Mar 24, 2011
I understand this so well, I feel the same way all the time. Very good!
tokikomosoto Featured By Owner Mar 24, 2011
omg...did u write my bio...this is unreal...this is me on paper..i dunno if to be shocked devastated or angry for not being perfect...i love it:iconcryingplz:
Raggedy-Redhead Featured By Owner Mar 24, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
I'm glad you love it,nope I didn't write your biography.

I'm not sure what to say about how its you on paper but remember

nobody is perfect.
stormfan25 Featured By Owner Mar 24, 2011  Student Writer
I have been there. I used to love the irony when my friend told me that I couldn't act. But, I guess I just got tired of pretending.
Raggedy-Redhead Featured By Owner Mar 24, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
The irony is something I both love and hate,
The love due to its funny that people say I can't act.
But I hate that It is ironic in the first place.

if that makes sense.
stormfan25 Featured By Owner Mar 24, 2011  Student Writer
yeah it makes sense
Add a Comment:

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Submitted on
March 24, 2011
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